The Torn Pages

Archive for the ‘Health’ Category

The World Keeps Turning

Despite my lack of blogging, yes, the world does go on. Surprise! Okay, not so much.

Let’s see… where do we stand today?

My eldest daughter was to move out to her own apartment next Saturday, but possibly now has to wait until later next week as she’s having landlord issues (things not being ready yet). Fingers are crossed it all works out for her. I’m sure she will be happier to be in her own space again and not have me looking over her shoulder. She can then also eat however she wants (oooo… snap!). If you are reading this, daughter, I just know it has been hard for you to eat more of a ‘restricted’ diet than you are used to. I’m sure being able to choose your own meals all the time will be easier for you.

Having brought up the subject, diet is still going well although plateau is still in effect. I am still losing inches…and have recently purchased my first ever size SIX jeans. First ever since I was probably a teenager. I promised Hubs I wouldn’t be in anything smaller, ’cause, well, I’m a tall girl and I just can’t see that my hips can get any narrower without bone surgery. I mean, I have had four kids after all. Some things just are as they are. However, I’m fine with that. I’m thrilled, as a matter of fact. I would still like to lose more weight, however, specifically my tummy and my arms still need it – and, yes, I have been notified you can’t ‘target’ certain areas, so I’ve basically got to just keep trying to lose it all over. I’m just waiting for the magic day when I can say “done”!

This week I’ve gotten myself to ten miles. Walking. Ten miles. Yup. That wasn’t a typo. I remember when, in February, I thought a half a mile was gonna kill me. Now ten. I stun myself. No running, however, as with my back surgeries and all I don’t want to risk any higher impact stuff that may screw up back or knees or hips or any other of my ‘old’ parts… but walking? Walking I can do. Yeah, it takes me awhile, but what difference does it make if I’m walking on the treadmill or laying in bed watching TV? Except one is making me healthier. I’m also doing at least 300 sit ups a day trying to get the gut down, but again… not a whole lot of progress there yet. Yes, I said YET. I’ve not give up the ghost of having a trim tummy one day…

So, that’s the update on the body.

The mind? I still have one. My mom is still managing to give me pause from time to time, however. She managed to fall on her face about six weeks ago while walking the dog. Cut her head, cheek and hand and had to have an ambulance come get her and then had stitches. Ended up with the most horrid black and blue eye which then spread all over her face and down into her neck. She claimed it never did hurt, however. I got a little girl in the neighborhood to walk the dog while she was laid up but mom ‘fired’ her (well, let her go) after the little girl wasn’t going for as long as mom thought she should be. Mom felt she could do a better job herself… so, okay, fine. Let’s see how long it takes before you fall down again and do some more damage. Don’t get me wrong… I’m glad mom has the dog as she is great company for her and mom says the dog won’t eat unless she does, so I know she’ll at least eat once a day. However, I wasn’t crazy about mom walking the dog in the ice and snow and now she’s proven she’s not real reliable on sunny dry days either. But she’s too cheap to give the little neighbor girl a couple of bucks to take the dog out. *sigh* Frustration doesn’t begin to cover it.

What else…

Younger daughter graduated with her second college degree. That’s the good news. Bad news is she hasn’t found a job in her field yet. I have confidence the jobs are out there, just not sure if she’s going to be able to stay around here to get one. She wants to… and of course we’d love her to… but the economy? Maybe not so cooperative. Still, I’m keeping my fingers (and toes) crossed.

Youngest son is still racing and doing well. He actually won a couple of weeks ago despite some motor issues. I’ve gone to a few of the races, but the weather isn’t really cooperating yet. It’s been dropping down into the 30′s and 40′s on race nights and that, my friends, is just too damn cold for me. Now when it starts staying in the 60′s or 70′s that will be more like it. Looking forward to those days.

Last, but not least, eldest son and his wife have been doing the ‘homeowner’ thing… they bought a new house last summer and this spring have started doing some landscaping. Having doing that all myself I know how much work that can be. My sympathy goes out to their sore muscles.

So… that’s about it in my world. Things keep going and I guess I just come by from time to time to make sure the old blog is still here and hopefully to touch base with a few of you who still come by as well. Feel free to say “hi” if you do… I’d love to hear from you.

Picking Up My Jaw Off the Floor

I didn’t (and still don’t) intend on this blog becoming a health and diet journal, but honestly people… I have to tell you this stuff or I’ll explode. Bear with me.

The last post? The update? Well, those jeans were a size 12. I analyzed the way they fit and wondered, “can I get into a size smaller?”… because, frankly, I could pull the waistband out at least an inch. First I asked my younger daughter who is my height and I know smaller than I am if I could try on a pair of her jeans. She let me and again, they fit. Size 12. Okay. Now I was feeling brave. I am fitting into “regular” jeans. Not “fat girl” jeans. I know you women understand that statement… Men, if you don’t understand, as a female friend.

So, feeling buoyed up by the whole thing I talked daughter into going shopping with me for jeans. At a real store. Not a “fat girl” store. Risking it, I took some size 10′s into the dressing room at daughter’s encouragement. I put them on and my daughter started laughing at me from the next room as the expletives came out of my mouth. I was stunned. I didn’t have to lay on the floor… and I could breath… AND I felt like I just might be able to go to another size smaller.

You heard me. I did. I put on a size 8. A size EIGHT. These are not baggie jeans. I did not have to lay down to put them on. I could still breathe. I could sit down without cutting off my circulation. I could move. Stunned is not the word for how I felt. I have gone from a size 18 “fat girl”… to size 8 “real girl” jeans.

Do you know how long it has been since I could get into a size EIGHT? Years. Years and years. Before my kids were born. AND… the most bizarre thing is, I haven’t even gotten to what the charts and the doctors call my “ideal” healthy weight. I may have lost all I need to off my butt and legs, but my gut and arms still need more, so am hoping that’s where the rest comes off. To that effect, I have started lifting weights for my arms and doing sit-ups for my gut.

I gave all my other jeans away. I don’t want to go back. I’m actually having fun looking at this “new” body. Now if I can just keep working on the inside so I don’t sabotage myself, I have a great chance of making it stick. In the past when I have even made a start on a weight loss program, it seems like as soon as I start getting some off and I may be drawing a little bit of attention, then I panic and bulk right back up again – throwing myself back into my protective cocoon. This time? I feel much more confident in myself. I feel there is going to be a lasting change because I did it the right way and for the right reasons.

I’m looking forward to the next phase… and, yeah, I’m kinda proud of myself. That sounds conceited and all braggy (is that even a word?)… but damnit, I deserve it. Let the cheering commence!

A Little Further On *UPDATED*

Here we are, a little further on. Actually has been only half a month. Better, huh? Oh, shaddup all you daily posters…

So, now as my Facebook buddies have noted, I am at a plateau. Ugh. I hate those. The walks have gotten to 5 miles a day (I actually went 6 today, but don’t know if I’ll sustain that… just trying to jump-start and get over the hump.) I am officially 25 lbs lighter than when I started. I have gone from a size 18 to a size 14 (and not the stretchy ones) jeans. I ordered a size smaller which are to come any day now just to tease myself and see how close I really was to getting into them, but they are more for an inspiration that actually fit, I’m thinking, at this point in time. I only have one pair of the 14 non-stretchy-real-jeans and I am wearing them sparingly. I do a little weight lifting, but not too much yet and have cut out mostly all of the diet soda, sweets, white foods, etc… and am trying to eat better and drinking tons of water. I even got registered for my first “official” run (in my case, walk). It is only a baby one – a 5K (a little over 3 miles) but there was no way I was going to be able to do the big one the same day that is a half-marathon. It is the first week in June and I’ll not be anywhere near that by then… plus? I’m not sure I really want to go for that kind of a goal. I’m not one to be needing to actually run anywhere and I don’t need to be adding to my already fussy back problems by getting knee or other joint problems. I ache enough from the walking thank-you-very-much. (Yes, I do have good shoes.) I go back to the doctor the third week in April and we’ll see what he thinks of my blood sugar numbers and my blood pressure numbers and I’m going to be keeping my fingers crossed that all this hard work has paid off and I get a pass on the insulin threat and the blood pressure medication suggestion.

So.

Now that I’ve bored you silly with all that health and wellness stuff… I can’t believe this weather! Yesterday was 80 degrees and beautiful. Today is to be as well, but windy (I can do without the wind). Unfortunately, work has picked up with the fields drying out and now I’m stuck in the office and can’t enjoy it as much as I’d like. I should be out doing something in my garden or walking outside instead of still on the treadmill. Guess it isn’t that warm at 4:30 a.m. when I’m walking anyway (and it is still dark), so the walking will stay inside for the time being. Still it would be fun to try it outside one of these days. Typical Iowa weather, it is going to change. Tomorrow. Temps dropping and a big rainstorm coming. Oh, well. I think we’ll all be ready for a break by then. Only bad thing is, son is supposed to start his official race season tomorrow night and it isn’t looking good… probably be rained out.

New developments in the family (again… still?). Now it appears as if daughter’s divorce is going through… after a brief month of “dating” and trying to see if they could work it out. Things blew up earlier this week so they called off the counseling session scheduled for tonight. I know this roller-coaster hasn’t been fun and I’m sure it has been even harder on her. Hope things level out now that a final decision has been made.

I think we’re all caught up now… again. Catch you in a bit.

*UPDATE* I can’t believe it!!! I ordered some new jeans in a smaller size and they came today. They FIT. I didn’t even have to lay on the bed to put them on! I am over the moon stunned. Seriously stunned. Whoo! That is 4 sizes, people. FOUR. YES!!! Okay, back to what you were doing…

What a Difference a Month Makes

A month. A whole month. I suck at blogging these days. So much for the “every day” thing. However, I must say I’ve done a few things right since I’ve not been blogging…

Around mid-January I decided I’d let my diabetes have free run long enough and I was going to try and reign it in again. Oh, I’d been taking my medicine, and hadn’t gone totally hog wild with the food, but fall and Christmas kicked my ass in the numbers. I wasn’t checking often because I knew the cookies and candy and rich foods I was eating was probably going to reflect badly … so, denial became my best friend. I forced myself onto the scale and at a (surprisingly NOT all-time high) weight of 205 I decided to take charge of this body and get my butt in gear. I don’t want this blog to become a diet / health blog, but I may refer to my milestones from time to time, just ’cause, yannow… it IS still my blog.

So I started watching what I ate. I started faithfully recording my blood sugar numbers daily. I started to move this couch potato body by walking. I started on January 15.

As of today, March 15, I have lost 20 pounds, 3 pant sizes, and am walking 2 miles a day… trying to work up to a 5K donut run taking place on April 10th. (That’s about 3 miles. Yeah, I had to ask too). I probably won’t actually be “running”, but hey… I’m glad just to be walking that far. Right now? I have another 30 pounds to go to reach my “ideal” weight by the powers that be. I have to go back to the doctor in April and after he threatened to put me on insulin if I didn’t get my numbers in shape, I’m hoping that my progress will be good enough by then to keep me off the insulin. A bonus would be if I could avoid blood pressure medicine (another possibility at the moment), and maybe even cut back on the medicines I’m already on. That may be asking for too much as I’ve been diabetic for about 20 years and the damage may be too far gone. I’m just thinking the better weight, better health, has got to help – in whatever way possible. I mean, it can’t hurt, can it?

So… that’s what I’ve been doing. I’m still hoping to get over to see you all more often and hoping to get here myself a little more regularly, but right now? I seem to be keeping kind of busy “offline”…