Love Trauma

This weekend as I watched my younger daughter and her fiance’ getting dressed up to go out to the bars in costume for Halloween, I mused to my husband… gee, I wish I were younger again. It looked like so much fun. Was one of those things I never did in my youth and I find it appealing in my ‘advanced’ age.

I take it back.

I don’t know what happened, but from Saturday night to Sunday night all hell broke loose. I’ve been told it has been coming for a few weeks, but the evidence wasn’t obvious. It seems the wedding is in peril. I’ve not pried, but when SIL2B (maybe) left on Sunday night things were pretty quiet and tense. She told her dad this ‘could be catastrophic’… and that was all.

Monday night she got home from work and immediately left to go out with a girlfriend to dinner, even though she ‘didn’t feel like eating anything’. She’d come home with a dozen red and white roses – from you-know-who. She said it ‘didn’t help’. This is serious. Then, he showed up on the doorstep about 8 o’clock. He lives in another state. It’s almost a four hour drive. He left right after work and drove like a bat. He’s obviously stressed. She’s not here. She’s not wearing her engagement ring. The roses are sitting on the kitchen counter – rejected.

DH comes home and proceeds to get philosophical about ‘these redheads’… recounting all the hellish times he’s had with me. I don’t think he’s helping, but I could be wrong.

Daughter comes home and we don’t see or hear anything out of them the rest of the night. The next day she’s off work and he’s called in sick. I leave for work hoping they will work things out today. I come home to find him gone and her in bed. This can’t be good.

She tells me she’s told him she will give him an answer in two weeks. Whether the wedding is on, off, or postphoned. I know she loves him. She’s having doubts. She’s being stubborn and independent. He’s trying. I’m not sure she is. I’m so frustrated I could scream. Not my life. Not my business. Better to know now than getting divorced, I understand that – probably better than most. I do hope it works out. I really do.

I tell DH… I’m sure glad we’re not that age again… we’re through all that. He agrees. We hug.