Dear Internet Provider

I’m a little late addressing this. Appropriately it should have been posted on Valentine’s day, as all expressions of love are. I wanted to thank you for the beauty that is you. After contacting not one or two internet providers and getting blown off, but THREE, you have come to my rescue. To think, you were only a mouse-click away. In two days you came to my house, installed my high-speed internet and left with barely a ripple in the pond that is my life. After months of struggling with dial-up connections (yes, pity me) and poor service, I am finally in the land of the click-click-click express. Lovin’ it!