Don’t you think it’s a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?*

So, if you don’t want to listen to whiney descriptions of bodily functions, skip this post.

I had a doctor appointment yesterday afternoon. I have a whole list of ailments that I’ve been putting off seeing a doctor for in the hopes that they will go away on their own. They haven’t, and I went.

First, as I’ve explained before, I’m a type II diabetic. A naughty, neglectful one. Please don’t scold. I’m old enough to know better. I go in swings of good and bad, probably linked to other things going on in my life. Stress tends to set me off schedule… as does the moon, chocolate, and Pepsi. Okay, did I mention I’m a naughty diabetic? Yeah. Okay… So. My one years’ worth of diabetic med perscriptions is about to wear off and I have to go give blood, pee in a cup, and in a couple of weeks when the tests come back, probably be scolded like a four-year-old. Got the meds refilled for another three months.

I started taking Lexapro about a year ago because of my (I hate this term) social anxiety. I’ve said before I’m anti-social and you didn’t believe me. I really, truly am. I’ve put up with it for years, but figured what-the-hell I’d ask my doc about it (the old doc) and see if I was someone that an anti-depressent might help. He thought so and perscribed it. I think it may have helped a little bit, but either I’m getting used to it or something because lately it’s been worse. Talked to this new doc about it and she thought I should double up. Okay. Will do. Then the kicker… “but I think you should see a counselor”. WTF??? No way in hell. This has been explained in earlier posts and maybe some on the Dark Madness, but counselor… ain’t gonna happen. So, we’ll be discussing that one later (in two weeks?) I would assume.

Then, I’ve been having arm/shoulder pain. The last time this happened – much more severely, I might add – I ended up having upper back surgery. Not fun. This time it’s not so bad, but has been increasingly getting worse. Well, gee… I’ve put up with it for three months and she (the doc) just doesn’t have time to address this issue right now. Let’s put it on the schedule for two weeks from now.

My ear and jaw hurt. A lot. I thought it was my jaw only at first, because I figured I’d been clenching my teeth in my sleep – a stress thing. Then, in the past week or two I decided I could feel things moving around in my ear. Well, surprise! She says I have fluid in both ears and my glands are swollen. She’s surprised I don’t have a fever! Huh. She tells me she’ll give me something for it (then, ironically, forgets and I have to call on the way home for them to call the pharmacy to perscribe it.)

I have long-time bowel troubles that I’ve never brought up to a doctor, because frankly I don’t like talking about bowel troubles. (So, here I am spewing about it to the world… go figure). I have days I go without ‘going’… then the flood gates break and I’m having the runs. The cycle continues… ugh. Not without some pain involved, I might add. Well, gee… we’ll just talk about that one in a couple of weeks, too.

As much as I whine and crab about being an “old” lady… and yes, except for maybe Cait, I’m older than most of you, I am not OLD old… if that makes sense. My birthday is coming up this weekend and I’ll give you all a chance to pounce on me then. However, years ago, in my 20’s, I had a hysterectomy so I’ve not had the ‘pleasure’ of the monthly visits from Aunt Flo. However, this can complicate things when you start perceiving yourself as having hot flashes and night sweats and… well… gee? Could I be going through menopause? Doc says yes, but won’t perscribe any estrogen until I have a mammogram… in… all together now… two weeks. D’ya see a pattern here?

Basically, for an hour and a half sitting in a doctors office I got five perscriptions renewed (two seconds), blood and urine taken (30 seconds), and some blah blah blah (5 minutes). The rest has been “postponed” for two weeks. Wonder what the bill for this visit’s gonna be?

*Quote from

Keep ‘Em Coming!

I’ve gotten a very few responses to my card offer… what? You don’t trust me? You’re afraid I’ll come and getcha? What? Honest, I’m a middle-aged, midwest, very bland person that doesn’t like to leave the house. It would be hard for me to get up the gumption to come stalk you…

For those of you who can’t figure out my e-mail address, here it is:
Spammers, stay away please.

Remember, Christmas is coming and I’m sending these SOON, so hurry!