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Bleh

Posted by Sue on August 3, 2008 in Life, Self-exploration |

There haven't been any blog posts lately because there hasn't been much to blog about. This post is no exception. I am still having bouts of sickness, thanks to the miracles of modern medicine. First they started me on the new injectable medication that, combined with my two oral meds, began almost immediately giving me low blood sugar. For those of you who aren't diabetic just imagine a time in your life when you were very sick with flu and were weak, sweating, lightheaded, heart-pounding, shaking… yeah, that's pretty much low blood sugar. It isn't fun. Then the doc stopped all the oral meds and my blood sugar went through the roof. That was a bit better, except I was still experiencing the nausea the injectable can cause.

Finally, a week after being off the oral meds and my blood sugars being so high, the doc started me back on one of my oral meds. Naturally, it is the one that has always caused me the worst side effects when I go on it. Nausea, cramps and frequent trips to the bathroom – if you get my drift. So, now it has been a week of getting used to the oral med again. Ugh.

Now it is Sunday and I am frustrated and disappointed. Today was supposed to be our third family game night. I called it off on Friday, figuring that even if I felt better by today I wouldn't have the energy to get the house in shape after a few weeks of being ignored. My kids are terrific and are all good friends so they are still going to get together and go out to dinner. Still, I feel badly to miss out. I feel like I'm letting everyone down, including myself.

The gardens are weedy, the house is one big dirt ball, and although I've been keeping up with the dishes and the laundry, I just feel things aren't right. I need to be myself again. I need to have energy and willpower and quit having this icky feeling. I want to go back to work, back to being myself. I've never been a huge ball of fire, but I was a whole lot better than this. I wish I would hurry up and get over this so I could get on with my life. 

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