Once upon a time there was this very nice lady who lost her mind. Lost her marbles. Cracked up. In polite language, had a nervous breakdown. It seems there were a lot of things this nice lady was keeping inside. For years… and years. Things that you’ll have to go to the other blog to read about.
At any rate, when this nice lady ‘lost it‘ there were some casualties. The first and foremost being her husband. This man has the patience of Job. You wouldn’t know it on a daily basis, because he has a tendency to get a little riled up about things, but in the big picture he is a marshmellow. He rants and raves, then goes back and apologizes to whoever he has just ranted and raved at. He feels badly for days if he doesn’ t get that opportunity. He’s very old fashioned and rather stoic when it comes to pain. He doesn’t like to see anyone in pain – physical or emotional. Especially emotional.
She came to the relationship damaged goods. Physically and mentally. Some of it he knew about, some of it she thought she had under control and would never have to let out of it’s special box. Like most of the rest of us know, monsters cannot be boxed forever. Eventually they have to come out.
When hers came out, it came out in a big way.
Several months went by full of pain and anger and severe depression. Suicide was contemplated and dismssed. Divorce was contemplated and dismissed. Leaving was contemplated and acted on. She drove across country to visit a relative she thought could help with part of her rage by answering some long-lost questions. So desperate was she to leave, she didn’t bother to make sure and contact this relative, so when she had been gone for a few days her husband called this relative and then found she hadn’t called, nor had she shown up yet. He’d spoken to her on the phone, but she wouldn’t say for sure where she was… some therapists brilliant idea to make her face independence. It almost killed him. He was desparate and scared and lost. He didn’t know which end was up.
She sat in motel rooms and drove through deserts and played music to drown out the echos of ghosts in her head. She missed her children more than she ever thought possible. When she left, she felt they’d be so much better off without her. She realized it didn’t matter. She needed them. She finally came to a peace of mind – a decision that would change her forever. She faced the fact that in the big picture the only thing that could change at this point was her. She talked to her husband. She admitted she needed him. She told him she’d changed. She told him where she was. He was terrified at what he was going to find when his plane landed….They spent time together getting to know each other again and trying to put the pieces back together. They went to the relatives’ house – together – and found the answers she’d been seeking. It didn’t seem so important anymore.
Home, they were more alive than ever before. They began making plans for a future – not just living from day to day. They decided they had a future… a solid future. They faced the people they’d left behind who, as people do, had come to their own conclusions of what had happened. She left him. They’d whisper behind their backs. Poor guy. We always knew she was trouble. Now she’s proved it.
They put it behind them and moved on. She’s much better now.