As my youngest daughter prepares to marry the love of her life next March, I see the “happy couple” turning into the “stressed-out adversaries”. Oh, how well I remember those early days of figuring each other out and putting yourself on the line for the “rest of your life”. I hear bits and pieces of long-distance conversations (he’s already landed a good job in a bordering state) and know 9 or 10 o’clock at night after a long day at work is not the best time to be hashing out wedding details… or, for that matter, life details. Everyone is tired and short-tempered and what was meant for sarcasm or dry humor is suddenly taken the wrong way and we have a flare up of “what am I doing?” going on. On the odd weekends when true love is able to meet face-to-face, the big issues are drowned in the joy of being able to actually see one another, and the happiness overwhelms any thought of serious discussion or plans.
As I sit in an evening in quiet companionship with the love of my life, the twenty-five plus years we’ve been together meld into a blur. How we got to this point is a mystery, for it wasn’t always this way. We laugh at how we finish each other’s sentences and expect in a few short years we won’t have to say anything at all! Early on there were many obstacles to overcome. I was a ‘town kid’ born and bred and my sweetheart has always lived on a farm. There are a few years difference between us, but because he acts younger than his age and I like to think I’ve always been a bit on the mature side, we seem to meet in the middle. There are a few issues that come up where I can see his age showing and someday I’ll address some of those, but for the most part he and I agree. I, being an only child, had no siblings to love, hate, or otherwise mess with, where he is the eldest of three – which became a priceless gift when our children were young and the boys fought all the time and I was told that was “normal”. They weren’t going to kill each other. (Now they are grown, they actually like each other! What a blessing!)
I know my daughter has a life of love and happiness ahead with lots of laughter, hopefully few tears, and even fewer sorrows. The ride will be an adventure with many a side road to take and lots of unexpected detours – but it’ll be worth it. I know.