Ewwww… (A Poll)

I was reading a blog the other day when it brought back some … uh… unpleasant memories. I have a couple of questions for you. Feel free to answer anonymously if you wish, this is just a fact-finding mission.

1.) Do you pick your nose?

2.) If so, what do you do with the "product"?

3.) Has this behavior changed since childhood? If so, how?

4.) What is the grossest thing you have ever seen? (In REAL LIFE, people… not a movie or a picture, but something you have witnessed up close and personal.)

Why I ask:

Several years ago my eldest daughter was going through a divorce and she and her small son needed a new place to live. A very small farm house near us came up for rent and we knew the landlords. Because the previous tenants (PT) had left rather suddenly, there was quite a bit of mess to clean up and the house had some much-needed renovations before it was livable. At that time I wasn't working off the farm and my daughter was working full time, so I offered to help with the house – and the landlord agreed to pay for supplies as long as we furnished the labor. I was happy to do it to make my daughter's life a bit better. It really was a cute house. Just bad tenants.

I'm not sure I have ever been exposed to the conditions that some people are willing to live in. The house had a bad mice problem that the PT had evidently done nothing about. The first day in the house we found a dead mouse floating in the toilet. I think mice are a bit smarter than that, so have to assume the PT left it there as a house warming gift after they were evicted asked to leave. Needless to say, exterminators were called immediately.

Further joy was spread when my daughter and her male friend from work (who much later became her husband) were doing some cleaning one night after work and discovered PT had left a used condom in the bedroom. My daughter was mortified. To his credit, my now son-in-law stayed very cool about it all. I mean, really… was that necessary to leave behind? It wasn't even in an obscure place – we just hadn't gotten to that room yet.

The biggest shock of all was the condition of the second, smaller bedroom. The PT had two children – not real little, but by no means teenagers. However, they must have had some terrible physical ailment that made snot fly out of their noses at the speed of light, clinging to every surface of the room before it could be stopped by a tissue, a toy or possibly a hand. Oh… you mean you think they PUT that snot there? On the walls? On ALL the walls? I have to admit I vomited a bit. In my mouth. I spent days with a paint scraper and rough sand paper cleaning rock-hard snot off the walls so they could be disinfected, painted with Kilz, and finally given fresh coats of paint. Yes, we replaced carpeting, too. Don't ask.

I admit, I let the house get a bit untidy at times. I may walk in the house after work and realize I didn't get the garbage outside quick enough, but to paint my walls with snot? Ugh. I just don't get it.

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Middle-aged. Anti-social. Mom. Grandma. Town-raised farmer's wife. Iowan. Want more? Come read the blogs.

9 thoughts on “Ewwww… (A Poll)”

  1. eww, i just threw up in my mouth a little at that story! gross!!

    sure sometimes i need to pick my nose but i do it with a tissue and usually in private. i was never a nose picker/eater as a kid (thank god). i recently saw a girl pick her nose and examine it and then promptly eat it.

    i used to hate blowing my nose as a kid but now i understand the benefits. 😉

  2. I REALLY should have bought stock in Kleenex many years ago, as I go through BOXES of it every week–and have for years! My dust allergy–yeah, couldn’t pick a seasonal one– makes it necessary for me to be using tissues constantly. I couldn’t imagine–or WANT to–what my clothes, furniture, etc, would be like if I didn’t use them. UCK!!!!!

    When we moved into this house, we discovered that the last owners used to have dogs–and kept them in the back bedroom. How did we find this? We discovered quite a bit of dog poop UNDER the heat runs. (We have hot water heat.) What bothered me the most was this: that room was the LAST one we cleaned thoroughly, so we lived with this for several weeks before the discovery. (Granted, we didn’t USE the room till it was cleaned, but still…)

  3. I worked at a department store in high school and unfortunately had to use the restroom there one evening. I have always been reluctant to use public restrooms, but I had no choice that night. Here’s why it was a mistake. Someone had taken the thermostat cover off, filled it with feces and then replaced it back on the wall.
    I think no more details are necessary.

  4. 1. Yes to be brutally honest I admit that on occasion I have been known to initiate exploratory probes into one nostril or another with an index finger. This is not a frequent habit, nor is it necessarily a conscious one, but it is a less than flattering affliction that I am all too aware of. Fortunately this is not a nervous response, nor is it a frequent action, but sometime when circumstances are right I will find myself mining an olfactory cave often brought about by persistent itching. These probes often turn up no results, as I am not prone to allergies or other maladies that might clog the canals so to speak. But when dry, my nasal passages can become hypersensitive and result in a prickle that a mere docile scratch on the porous surface proves insufficient. There are times though, when my mining exploration produces results and an excavation of dried mucus or blood follows. At this point I either roll it around between my fingers and flick it on the ground, into a trash receptacle, or place it in a tissue when handy and dispose of at my first opportune moment. As a child my Mother caught me rummaging through my nostrils and decided to teach me a lesson so she went out and bought a microscope (not an easy task on a waitress salary) and showed me what “buggers” were made of. That day I learned several things. Microscopes are cool. The little “creatures” living in snot are cool. Moms don’t always understand little boys. And I was getting a microscope for my birthday. I decided then and there not to tell her about the lizard I accidentally ate in the parking lot that morning (hey the stoopid snake lizard bit me and scared the bejeezuz out of me, he had it coming!).
    2. I think I may have already answered that.
    3. I think I may have already answered that as well.
    4. No doubt in my mind. Balute. Balut is a popular Filipino street snack and is essentially a duck egg with a fetus inside, typically between seventeen to twenty days in gestation.
    do not go to this page if you have a queazy stomach.

    I had renters in my house just like that once, when we rolled up one of the carpets and carried it outside, rats and cockroaches ran from it like a sinking ship, still gives me the willies today…

  5. Eeew@what Stephanie P saw in the public restroom. Michael, you certainly have a way with words! I’m dying laughing here.

    Since I work by the emergency room in a hospital, I’ve seen more than my share of gross things. It would be too hard to pinpoint the grossest. I remember many years ago when an elderly woman came in with a very filthy ace bandage wrapped around her leg. Long story short, when the dirty bandaging was removed there was a large family of maggots living in her leg wound. I didn’t see the maggots with my own eyes (just saw the smelly filthy leg bandage) though but trust me…that is a true story.

    When I was a kid our grade school principal would always stand at the front of the lunch room and watch over us. It was a common practice of his to slowly move his hand up and in what he apparently thought was a covert way, he would dig a booger out of his nose and then slowly move that hand down to his side and we kids would see him rolling the booger between his fingers for a long long time and then eventually he would move his hand back up slowly toward his face and then he would cough or something and put his hand near his mouth and pop the booger in his mouth. Many years later my own daughter was going to the same grade school and this same principal was nearing retirement. One day she had a little girlfriend come over to play and they were giggling about Mr. “J” and his boogers. I asked what they were talking about and she told how he would do this exact same thing…still eating boogers in the lunch room after all those years. Mr. “J” died about ten years ago and to this day when I think of him, that is what comes to mind.

    I guess one of the grossest things I have seen and heard at work is this one particular old man who is a “frequent flyer”. He looks exactly like Grandpa Munster and is a very annoying person. When he sits in the lobby waiting room, he constantly clears his throat, hacks and coughs up phlegm and then swallows it and starts all over again. It is absolutely disgusting! Sorry such a long post!! Please forgive me!

  6. Boogers, never a problem with me, so no comment. However, after my husband died, I had to take over management/ partial ownership of 92 duplex rentals. After about three years, I was able to sell this complex and stay home with my two babies. Not so fast, within one year I had to repossess the whole thing and start all over again.

    You could not imagine what I encountered except you lived the same thing in your story. Multiply horror stories about twelve times and you get the idea what I went through. I thought losing my soulmate so young was the most impossible thing to ever go through, but to have to go back and make what had been the neatest rental property around at that time back into what it had been almost did me in. We actually had to carry out a petrified cat from a back bedroom in one of the units. My sister lost her lunch over that one! I even had to call McDonald’s to come get a five-foot tall thousand dollar trash can (yeah, the one with rocks glued all over it) out of the living room of one unit. It took four guys and some heavy-duty equipment to remove it.

    I also had to evict a machette-wielding maniac out of a unit who kept his motorcycle in the living room. Enough, you get the story. I think you and Hubs and daughter and boyfriend are to be commended on tackling that job….sure understand, too. You are good people!

  7. I landlorded in Hawaii so I ran across this stuff as well, esp. with some of the tenants that were in our units before I got there (about 95% of the ones I selected were pretty damn good). But the worst was my first in that it was a Section 8 tenant that left the place and it was filthy and there was cat piss everywhere — and she had two small kids. It was so toxic and we basically ripped up the carpet and poured bleach everywhere. So gross.

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